Alright, so everyone's losing their minds over this crypto rally. Bitcoin hitting almost $88k? Bonk and Kaspa up 5%? Market cap supposedly over $3 trillion? Give me a break.
Rate Cut Savior? More Like Smoke and Mirrors
The Fed's Little Game They're blaming—sorry, *crediting*—the Fed and its potential rate cuts. Oh, the Fed's gonna save us all, right? Polymarket and Kalshi data showing an 82% chance of a rate cut? CME Fed Tool data at 78%? Yeah, I'll believe it when I see it. These "experts" couldn't predict a sunrise if their lives depended on it. And let's be real, the Secured Overnight Financing Rate (SOFR) dropping to 3.91% is hardly cause for popping champagne. It's still almost almost 4%! Don't even get me started on the "experts" who are claiming that this rally is because the Fed is ending its quantitative tightening policies. It's like they think we're all idiots who forgot that the US public debt is at a record high. And what about the global M2 money supply increasing? Are we just going to ignore that?Dogecoin ETFs: Have We Learned Absolutely Nothing?
ETF Mania: The Next Level of Dumb Money And then there's the ETF frenzy. Grayscale and Franklin XRP ETFs launched, raking in a combined $94 million on day one. All this XRP is now worth over $586 million. Seriously? People are still throwing money at XRP? I thought we learned our lesson with that whole debacle years ago. But wait, it gets better. The SEC, in a moment of sheer brilliance (that's sarcasm, in case you missed it), allowed the launch of the first Dogecoin ETF. A Dogecoin ETF! We're literally making it easier for people to gamble on internet memes. Grayscale's DOGE ETF already has over $1.4 million in net assets. What in the actual... Offcourse, Bitwise and 21Shares are jumping on the bandwagon with their own Dogecoin ETF approvals. Why not, right? Let's just turn the entire market into a casino. And a Chainlink ETF (GLNK) is next? Are you kidding me? I swear, sometimes I think the entire financial world is just one big, elaborate joke that we're all in on, except nobody's laughing.Crypto IPOs: The South Korean Gold Rush (or Fool's Errand)?
IPOs and South Korean Shenanigans Oh, and Upbit, the biggest crypto exchange in South Korea, is thinking about an IPO in New York after merging with Naver. Because that’s exactly what we need – more crypto companies going public. Bullish and Gemini already did it, Kraken filed, Figure and Circle already went public in the past few months. It's like a damn gold rush, except instead of gold, it's…well, you know. Upbit handled over $2 billion in trading volume in the last 24 hours, compared to Gemini's measly $277 million. Maybe I should just move to South Korea. Nah. Then again, what do I know? Maybe this time it's different. Maybe this rally is sustainable. Maybe the Fed really is going to save us all. Maybe Dogecoin will become the world's reserve currency. Or maybe…it's just another dead-cat bounce. A temporary pump before we all get rug-pulled back into the abyss. John Williams, head of the New York Fed, supports a rate cut in December, a sentiment shared by Christopher Waller and Mary Daly on Monday, November 24, 2025. So what? They are often wrong. Crypto rally today: here’s why Bitcoin and top altcoins are going up - Invezz So, What's the Catch? Look, I'm not saying this rally is definitely fake. But I am saying to keep your expectations in check. This whole thing feels…off. Like something's about to break. Just remember to keep your wits about you. It might be a good moment to take some profits. Or it might be a great time to buy. I don't know. That's the point.